Oh Lord, Won't You Buy Me a Mercedes Benz

The Divine Ms. P

Well, frumps, so far January has been quite the “Palin-palooza” of a month. In case you’ve been paying more attention to things that actually matter, Sarah Louise has just been added to the Fox News collection of talking heads. That’s right, frumps, La Palin will be adding her version of “fair and balanced” to the Fox News stew as of, well . . . this past Tuesday, where she made her professional info-tainer debut on the Bill O’Reilly Fuddy Duddy Hour.

Watch:

As always, Sarah is not without her critics (who are not without grounds for criticism). Here’s a dose of that:

Now, one might think that signing with Fox might be enough excitement for one month but, evidently, La Palin is “on a roll” as they say in show biz. Rumor has it that she has not once, but twice turned down a speaking gig at the annual Coven of Conservatives known as CPAC. CPAC is about as high-profile as it gets in conservative circles. One would think that a woman that God planned to install in the Vice President’s office would jump at the chance to swan around amongst her party’s deep pocketed conserva-types that covene there.

Instead, Palin has agreed to keynote the first annual Tea Party convention (one of them) being held in Nashville for any of the “grassroots” crowd that can afford the $549 price of admission (travel and accommodations not included). If one chooses to skip the Sarahbelle keynote speech, the ticket becomes a marginally more affordable $349. Clearly, the Nashville event is going to draw a much smaller, Palin-friendlier audience than CPAC. Palin will join WorldNetDaily Editor-in-Chief Joseph Farah on the roster (just to give you a sense of where this event is headed). Informed guesstimates put Palin’s purse for the Tea Party outing at somewhere between $75K – $100K.

Also, the Tea Party event will generously be covering the Divine Ms. Palin’s every expense while, on the other hand, CPAC’s director, Lisa de Pasquale stated that “We don’t pay honorarium, travel or hotel expenses for any speakers, past or future.” Another consideration that tipped the scales toward the Tea Party was the recent announcement that, per Palin’s request, there will be no press coverage of her keynote speech or the dinner that follows (as usual). And no Palin interview audiences will be granted for the duration of the event. So if you’re planning a bake sale to raise money to send your very best Tea Party blogger to pick Palin’s brain – fugeddaboutit (as the say in Jersey).

All of this hoopla has not had a unifying effect on the Tea Party movement (for which we are grateful). Even Erick Erickson, the founder of conservative blog RedState, served up some snark on the topic. In a blog post, Erickson said he is worried that the Tea Party “has largely descended into ego and quest for purpose for individuals at the expense of what the tea party movement started out to be.”

He wrote:

“Let me be blunt: charging people $500.00 plus the costs of travel and lodging to go to a “National Tea Party Convention” run by a for profit group no one has ever heard of sounds as credible as an email from Nigeria promising me a million bucks if I fork over my bank account number. “

Indeed!

Hypocritical much?

With all of this hissing over Palin’s profit-motive she, of course, fired off a statement saying that she will not be making a penny from the Tea Party gig. (Perhaps she’s donating it to the Alaskan Wolf Orphan’s Fund, or some such).

Now, sniffing this amount of controversy in the air, most mere mortals might step off stage for a minute or two just to let the dust settle. Not Palin. It was announced a few days ago that Sarah the Magic Christian will be making an appearance in Las Vegas to address none other than the Wine and Liquor Wholesalers of America. CNN has cited the WLWA CEO, Craig Wolf announcing Tuesday that Palin will keynote the group’s annual convention and expo in Las Vegas in early April.

According to Wolf’s statement:

“Governor Palin is a great supporter of America’s free enterprise system and understands that industries like the beverage alcohol industry play a key role in driving our national economy. We’re proud and honored to welcome her as a speaker. We expect she will share with the convention attendees her analysis of the current political environment and her vision for America’s future.”

Good luck with that . . .

The Las Vegas stop comes a few days before Palin is scheduled to address the Southern Republican Leadership Conference in New Orleans, a major gathering of GOP leaders that that in recent years has become an early proving ground for potential presidential candidates.

Now, just as a little backgrounder here’s where Sarah Louise said she was coming from the last time that she ran for high office; this piece ran in the Chicago Tribune during the McCain-Palin campaign:

“Just as McCain’s politics are largely shaped by his experience as a prisoner of war and Obama’s by his embrace of his racial identity, Palin’s approach has been shaped by her relationship with God. Palin sees her government work as paling in comparison to a greater mission.”

“I can do my job there in developing our natural resources and doing things like getting the roads paved and making sure our troopers have their cop cars and their uniforms and their guns, and making sure our public schools are funded,” she said in June to ministry students at her former church. “But really, all of that stuff doesn’t do any good if the people of Alaska’s heart isn’t right with God.”

“Historically a key constituency for the GOP, conservative Christian voters had been uneasy about McCain, doubting his commitment to fighting abortion. For them, the choice of Palin as his running mate removes doubt, as they know Palin’s position on the issue is sealed by her faith.”

The campaign, of course, had to walk a bit of a tightrope on Palin’s religious beliefs because she has been a member, for thirty years of an Assembly of God church which could be construed as a tad “ultra” even to Christian Coalition types. The same Chicago article tried to explain Sarah’s “Christianity” (without alarming voters, unduly) in this “clear as mud” way:

“Palin was baptized as an infant in the Roman Catholic church, but she would spend nearly three decades in the Assemblies of God church, the nation’s largest Pentecostal denomination and the church of former U.S. Atty. Gen. John Ashcroft.”

“She now eschews the denominational label, choosing to attend independent churches in Alaska and calling herself a generic Christian when asked. But she remains connected to the Assemblies of God, addressing pastors’ conferences and ministry students.”

“Many of Palin’s beliefs mirror those of evangelical Christians. But Pentecostals occupy a distinct subset of evangelical Christianity. They believe they can be “baptized in the Holy Spirit” just as Jesus Christ’s apostles were in the New Testament’s Book of Acts. Gifts of the spirit include speaking in tongues, prophesy and faith healing.”

I guess they threw in Ashcroft as a sober, serious non-speaking-in-tongues evangelical example.

So, OK, maybe Palin doesn’t get into the Dances with Snakes thing but her church’s core beliefs are still pretty clear on alcohol. Here’s the official guidance that the Assembly of God put out on its website:

“Alcohol. The Scriptures speak often of the destructive power of alcohol. Noah’s drunkenness brought shame to his family (Gen. 9:20-27). Lot’s drunkenness resulted in an incestuous relationship with his two daughters (Gen. 19:30-38). An inebriated Xerxes sought to humiliate Queen Vashti publicly (Est. 1:9-22). The consumption of alcohol impairs judgment, inflames passions, and invites violence (Lev. 10:8-11; Prov. 20:1, 23:29-35, 31:4,5).”

“Alcoholism and the depression associated with it often leads to a breakdown of moral inhibitions, indiscreet or violent behavior, or loss of consciousness (drunkenness). Long-term drinking can terminally damage liver, pancreas, brain, or heart. Binge drinking on university campuses has caused instant death. It is estimated there are 14 million problem drinkers in the United States. Half of the fatal automobile accidents are caused by alcohol-impaired drivers. The annual cost of alcohol-related accidents, illness, violent crime, and loss of work time is estimated to exceed 100 billion dollars.”

So how, exactly, does lending her celebrity to the annual Wine and Liquor Wholesalers of America jamboree in Sin City fit with Palin’s determination to “get right with God?”

Harkening back to an earlier paragraph: